Friday, April 22, 2016

What do you do?

In the land of facebook, all seems well.
Children are getting good grades and well behaved.
New homes are purchased and vacation pictures abound.
Verses pop up and all is well with each soul.
Or so it seems.
But what do you with reality?
Parents get sick. Husbands lose their jobs. Finances are tight. Children have no interest in the good and true. Emotions toss us like waves in a storm. Darkness descends as sickness seems to take over our bodies.
What do you do?
The reality is not often the picture we see presented.
Behind the scenes, we often struggle with the reality of life. It is not easy. Our souls cry out to God for relief. Fix this God. Change them, God. Do something, God. Do you really care, God? And so our minds race. We wonder what we are doing wrong.We look at other lives and compare where we are to where they seem to be. If can become our constant companion.
Today I stand to look out on life, my view is so limited.
I am reminded today that my eyes are not to be focused on life, instead, they should be focused on Him. How is this even possible? My reality is ever in front of my eyes.
Today I am asking Him for eyes to see.
Father, open our eyes. Let us see our lives and this world through your eyes. I don't even know what that looks like at this point. And though we want to flee from the chaos around us....let us stand. May we not be found with our backs to the enemy. May we not rest and become despondent. I know you are calling forth in us what we were called to be. You are asking us to trust that you see the finished work we will be and you are orchestrating the steps it will take us to get there.
We do want to resemble you.

It is well, it is well with our souls.

We are loved. We truly are.

Monday, April 18, 2016

Hello sweet Lady,

How are you? (Feel free to comment. I would love to pray for you.)

These past few days I find that I am reminded constantly of my decision to turn things over to Him. Rolling the weight of things over to His shoulders is not an easy thing for me. I am a planner by nature. And in our day and time, we want things fixed quickly. This often has caused me a great deal of stress.
Recently my husband lost his job. I was stunned. We have been down this road, a road I never wanted to visit again. I do believe now that it was for his protection. But at the time, I just wanted to think that we had done what we were called to do and this was not fair. And as in the past, my mind went into overdrive. What could I do to fix this?
After so many years of walking through hurts and disappointments, my relationship with God had become one of great reserve. For years, in abandon, I had thrown up my hands in worship and let Him know that whatever He wanted....I wanted. It would be a glorious road, right? To my eyes, it was not. It was filled with hardship and pain. Eventually, I just shut down. I thought it was an avenue that would protect me. This road sent me into a very deep depression. Loneliness became my constant companion.
The hand of the enemy was heavy in my life.
In recent years, there were times of trying. Trying to figure out how to get free. Would I ever be able to feel like I could breathe? Never believe that God can not use the dark times for His glory. Like Jonah, He was bringing me to the end of my own self-reliance.
Today I am practicing putting the other end of the yolk on His shoulders. I have been trying to drag the weight by myself. I do think that part of placing the yolk on His shoulders involves letting others know what you are going through. Humbly letting others know that you have not arrived and then letting them speak into your life. Why do we feel we must have it all together before we let others know of our struggles? I am not perfect and I do not have it all together. Don't get me wrong, I have learned so much in my years of walking with God. But, I need others.
We have been trying to sell our tractor for years. I know God knows this would wipe out our debt. Oh to be debt free! Last week I listed the tractor for sale once again. We received several interested responses. Inside I was bursting! Freedom! And then a snag reared its ugly head. We can not find the title to the trailer. This sometimes happens when you have moved six times since you purchased said
trailer. Into a tailspin of figuring and planning I went. I looked through boxes till there were no more. My head was beginning to hurt and my jaw was hurting. I was exhausted and mad.
This morning I began the day with fresh mercies. After a call from a sweet friend, I began the process of placing the other end of the yolk back on His shoulder. Every time the mind frenzy began, He reminded me of the choice I had. Yes, LORD, your way is best and beneficial to my heart and mental health. Taking every thought captive brings peace.
So, today, I choose to walk in the security that He is in control. He knows the plans that He has for us and I choose to abandon my future to Him thought at a time.

You are loved, girl! Has anyone told you that today? You are. Just as you are, you are loved!

Talk to you later!