Wednesday, January 6, 2010

Until then

The morning dawned a little later than normal because of a two hour delay.
It has been colder here at night..6..they haven't seen these temps in years.
So with the roads frozen with some ice and a little dusting of snow......we got a little break.
(Side thought here )
Did you know that it is illegal in our area to go out and start your vehicle
so that it can warm up while you finish getting ready?
Who knew?!
Shhhh.....don't tell anyone....but I have broken the law a lot lately. :)
I do think it is a tad hard to drive when your body is frozen......we shall have to see if this family continues to break that law. I wonder if the police keep this law?

And so off to school we went....in a warm vehicle...because I broke the law.


And blissfully unaware of our guilt we crossed the bridge to get to the school and we were greeted by a little God glitter.
The ground was covered by it.......a little personal touch by God that made me smile.
Sorry, I didn't get a picture....it is kind of hard to drive a standard and use a camera. I am sure the other Moms appreciated my use of wisdom this morning. But you would have loved a peek at our mountains all white from there oh so cold night.

Yes, I am a Jeep woman right now.
Elayne was so sweet to let me use her extra vehicle while Keith is looking for a new used truck.
Did you know I have always wanted a Jeep?
So God is giving me a little taste of something I have wanted since my youngest was a babe.
Sad to say but it was a bit down hill this afternoon.
I am afraid that my emotions just got the better of me and I just rolled over and gave in.
I know, I know......how could I sink so low?
I would say I have had ENOUGH.....but I guess God thinks differently.
Why oh why?
So evedentally God thought it was time for me to have a friendly firm/loving pep talk from three people. One of them actually had the nerve to ask me what I would tell one of my girls if one of them was acting like I was. Oh yes he did!

I don't think he appreciated my response....the poor thing will have to sleep next to me since we don't happen to own a dog house. :)
He was right of course.....but to be honest I can't wait to shoot that right back at him the next time he gets down. I know....for shame!
(Jumping  subject..kind of)
So this afternoon as I was out trying to empty our frozen holding tank....and I took a moment to look around at His frozen creation.
There were massive globs of ice hanging from sticks.....and then ice that was more pie shaped as it dipped up and down in the moving stream.
It was all beautiful...and put there by the hand of God.
He was near!
And so as I cried out to Him.....wondering in my flesh if He had forgotten about me..about us. He hasn't and took a moment to remind me of Pauls words in Hebrews.
You know those words where Paul reminded us that HE promised NEVER to leave us or forsake us?
And yet....still my flesh groaned.
My mind flashed back over all the times He had come to our rescue...and yet where was He now?
Does He see that this is NOT good?
And here is where I begin to have one of those back and forth conversations inside myself....come on....I know you have done it to. O.K...some call it a pep talk...call it what you may...we all do it.
It went something like this.....
"Now Sharon.....you know He sees all. And you know that if this was going to destroy you...He would stop it. And you know that this would have to work out for your good....or He would be a liar. And Sharon...you know that is not possible....because He is not man."
And so...since misery loves company..  ;)  I went looking in the good book for someone who would pat me on the back and say....Girl, I understand!
And just where do you think I landed.......right...the book of Psalms. When I get to heaven I will have to give David a good ole pat on the back for being honest....and writing it down! :)
And here is a little tid bit of our time commiserating together. ;)
I run to you, God; I run for dear life. Don't let me down!
      Take me seriously this time!
   Get down on my level and listen,
      and please—no procrastination!

Amen and amen..don't let me down!
Hmmm.....David, don't know if I would have told Him not to
procrastinate. But..I guess I have probably said that with my heart.

Be kind to me, God—
      I'm in deep, deep trouble again.
   I've cried my eyes out;
      I feel hollow inside.
   My life leaks away, groan by groan;
      my years fade out in sighs.
   My troubles have worn me out,
      turned my bones to powder. .

Ahem....talk about having me pegged! Deep trouble here God! SIGH!
 Warm me, your servant, with a smile;
      save me because you love me.
   Don't embarrass me by not showing up;
      I've given you plenty of notice. 


Just a smile God....maybe a red bird?
(head bowed)...I know You love me.
Um David, that last line makes me want to back up a little.....nothing like telling Your Maker what to do.
But like you.... I would say that is exactly what I have been doing...amid reminding Him of the promises He made in the word.

So I will end the day thanking Him that He is God and I am not....and with a reminder of the truth from a man who was a man after God's own heart.

Love God, all you saints;
      God takes care of all who stay close to him,
   But he pays back in full
      those arrogant enough to go it alone.

  Be brave. Be strong. Don't give up.
      Expect God to get here soon
.
 Soon Lord? Soon?
And if you would like to read this Psalm in it's entirety.....go on over to Biblegateway.com.

12 comments:

Nise' said...

Girlfriend, you are not alone! I have had that same situation and God reminded me just today that His timing is perfect! I may see it immediately, but more often in hindsight!

Love you!

Halfmoon Girl said...

He is right there with you in the situation, Sharon. I know that you know this, but also send my hugs and prayers to you because it IS HARD to live out these times! You are right to cling to His promises and to show Him your heart, warts and all!

SunnySusan said...

Sharon...I always wanted a jeep too...funny....
Girl...you are not alone....I am praying for you and yours......love you

Oh Sew Good said...

Funny. I can't seem to find it anywhere in my Bible where it says we can't be real with God right where we're at with the emotions we have. Who wouldn't feel like that? I had many, many of those moments and God comforted me through all of them. I do understand how you feel. Okay, so granted I didn't live in a trailer for long but I did live in a trailer, pregnant, away from family and friends and alone all day while husband was at work.

luvmy4sons said...

So love your transparent heart sweet sister. All I could think is that if we do not give God our ugliness(which He knows already) how can He come in and transform us and give us His goodness! I think He is big enough to hear the thoughts He knew before we even formed them...but He knows that in our giving them to Him that He changes us! Loved your honesty in this post...got me to thinking. Love ya girlfriend. Interesting law thought about warming up a car. Who knew?

Amy said...

We warm up our cars, too, but I doubt anybody would notice up here. Funny that you're borrowing a Jeep while ours is in for repair...

Give me a call if you want to (and can) come over for tea sometime!

Amy

Mary said...

Sharon, we aren't supposed to warm up our cars either, but if you want your motor to last, you need to. These frigid temperatures are very hard on car motors, even when the radiator and block are filled with antifreeze. If you don't use antifreeze, it can split the block and you will have to replace the motor, so you are wise to warm up your vehicle at least a little.

Glad you are driving the Jeep. It's always nice to realize your dreams.

Take care, be safe and stay warm.
Blessings,
Mary

Melanie said...

We always warm up our cars too. I don't know if we are allowed to do it or not. But for now I can claim ignorance.

Praying for you and for everything that is going on.

Denise said...

He created our emotions... He understand them....... One thing that I learned a long time ago...... I just talk to the Father God just like I would my earthy father.. I cry and blow my nose and fuss and tell Him what I feel.... I have had many a very very strong God moments after my emotional break...... He so loves us! Go and read my Samaritan Women today.. Mashed potatoes and KFC....... you will enjoy !

MelanieJoy said...

You've heard the song "Press On"??
"we find the strength to press on"
Keep pressing on....I know it's easier said than done...but I know you're heart and more important He does! Love you!!!!

Sharon said...

He hears you!!! You have encouraged me to press on! Awesome post for me to ponder today! Thanksssss

Happy New Year

Winging It said...

Love the Psalms, love David! I regularly turn there and quote them out loud as I putter quite often!

I have made much progress at learning to bare all with Him. Still working on it though! I find it helps me in the unexpected way of gaining a better perspective, just the act of doing it. He is aching for what you are going thru I know. He feels that pain and He will compensate you...you'll see!

love and prayers!
Maria